They are the greatest.
But I am not the greatest.
I am not a natural mother.
I did not imagine how many children I would have-
or what I would name them.
I pretty much just imagined marrying a tall, dark handsome guy
and riding off into the sunset.
I didn't anticipate what actually came after that.
I didn't fully understand my lack of preparation until I woke up the morning after Annie was born and realized I had a baby.
I had a BABY.
Did I want to see the baby?
No thanks, I 'll just look at her through the window.
I told you...NOT PREPARED.
But then she turned out super cool. A sassy little blondie... and SO smart.
So then we had Kate.
And then I learned the real definition of sassy.
And Kate was just a doll.
So we decided to have a boy baby, but instead we had Tessa.
Good thing, because she was sooo much cuter than a boy baby.
And we were so happy to have three beautiful girls.
But we were kind of tired too.
So we decided to take a break... a five year break.
And then in October,
we found out I was pregnant.
Surprised?
Me too.
Because that was NOT the plan.
But now it's 2011- a new year.
So I've made four resolutions:
1. Enjoy being Annie's Mom.
2. Enjoy being Kate's Mom.
3. Enjoy being Tessa's Mom.
4. Birth a Baby in June. (Enjoying that is not required.)
So I think that this year will be quite exciting. Not like I planned, and you all know how I love following the plan, but maybe even better than the plan. This is my chance to be mom. This is my shot. This is my chance to imagine what kind of mom I want to be- and then be it- or at least try hard to be. This is my chance to decide how many babies I want (FOUR). I want to take advantage of everyday with these girls. I want to listen to them and hear their funny stories. I want to hold Tessa even if she is just going to head-butt me and give me a fat lip- accidentally. I want to worry less about the plan. I want to really soak in this time with my sweet girls- because they may be crazy, sassy and head-butters, but I absolutely adore them all.
How's that for a resolution?
Please feel free to wish me luck.
Lots and lots of luck.
***
(Photos by Dana Peterson- my very talented friend)
15 comments:
Oh, Chanell, this is the WORST time of year to be going through morning sickness. Believe me. I know. Not once, but twice I was stupid enough to get pregnant and go through morning sickness during the holidays. But, June is the BEST time of year to have a baby. I have the fondest memories of last summer with a newborn baby. Good luck. Things will definitely get hairy- especially with 2 in diapers. But, you are a much better mom and wife than I am. :)
Oh wow...number 4 coming? Congrats! That must have been a somewhat scary but also exciting realization in October :).
Good luck with the next 6 months!
WOW, that's a surprise...but what a fun one! We're so excited for you. SO much for that "5 year break" right? haha. Oh well. Sometimes our plans aren't the best and someone else knows better. Congrats!
CONGRATULATIONS!!!! You always say you are not a good mom - but you are a GREAT MOM! The reason I know you are a great mom is because the simple fact that you are always wanting to be a good mom - makes you a good mom. You care - a lot - about your kids! Good luck on the pregnancy - You will definately have a busy house next summer! You have Brock and he is a great dad too! :) Love you guys! You almost have a bball team - might as well go with 5 kids now that you are close! :)
It is funny how you never really understand how intense it is being a mom until you are one. You are a great mom and you have three totally great little girls. Congrats, I am sure it will be tough for awhile, but one thing I've learned is that it doesn't stay crazy forever, and I am already feeling like they are growing up to fast. It might be a whirlwind for awhile though and that's alright, just keep low expectations of yourself after the baby is born and only focus on what Really needs doing.
Every time I try and plan out major life decisions, I get humbled into knowing who is really in control. Way to accept that, it's half the battle! We are excited to see if June brings you another adorable girl or a sweet boy who will be spoiled ROTTEN! :)
Loved your testimony today. You can do it. You are amazing and even if you think you aren't the greatest mom (which you are) you have one of of the best attributes!....you have the decire to learn, do better and grow. You are incredible!
Chanell- When I grow up can I be like you? You just rock. I love the way you see things, share things, and write things. Such a gifted lady and mom. Your girls are soooo lucky. You rock!
Congrats!!! I'm sure there will be times you will feel overwelmed, but for as long as I've known you, you will meet the challenge head on and conquer it. You are a great mom you can see it in the smiles on your girls faces. I'm excited for you.
I'm not going to wish you luck. You don't need it. You have love and that's all your children need and want. You are an amazing mom and this new baby is lucky to be coming to you and Brock and Annie and Kate and Tessa. Dad and I have full confidence in your abilities as a mother and wife. You go girl!!!
Congratulations! Hope you haven't been sick...I'm sure in when the girls are grown a little more you will love having your kids so close together. (oh and good luck..but I have a feeling you don't need it!)
Beautiful pictures of you and your lovely girlies! Congratulations, too!! Plus, you got this. You're already in baby-mode. Just stay there for a little while, ya know!!
Congrats Chanell!!!!! That is crazy and SO great all at the same time. (cuz there's really nothing you can do about it at this point, right?) I bet you are a super mom. We should really get together or something next time you're in town. I'm serious.
Congrats on adding a new member to your family. I can't believe you are going to have 4 children. On second thought I can't believe I have 4 children. Can't wait to hear what you are having. Hope you are doing well and if you ever have a minute when you are in Utah let me know because I would love to see you!!
Glad the surprise is out. Don't you feel better :) I love those picts! They are so cute!!!
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